The misconceptions about postive thinking
We have all heard about the Power of Positive Thinking. It is hailed as a magic wand that can miraculously change your perspective, lift up your spirits, and ease symptoms of depression. Positive thinking has been studied for decades and even the early Philosophers, like Epictetus, have talked about the power of transforming your life by simply changing your thought process. I have always struggled with the idea of Positive Thinking because it sounds easy to do, but in reality, it is more challenging than we think it is. Our brain is wired to think a certain way due to life experiences, education and cultural upbringing. If you tell someone who is severely depressed to think positive it can actually backfire because they have been in a negative state of mind for such a long time that they don’t know how to think positively. I remember when I first started studying Psychology and I learned about Positive Psychology. I was so excited about what I learned, because it seemed like the holy grail for mental health, that I wanted to share it with my dad who suffers from depression. Well, I had no idea that my enthusiasm for Positive Psychology would make my dad burst out in anger. If he would have been able to throw an object through the phone he would have probably done so. It took me years to realize why my dad was so angry. Before I go into details why Positive Thinking might not always be the right tool for everyone I do want to list some benefits of Positive Thinking:
Improves Longevity
Builds resilience
Reduces stress and anxiety
Improves self confidence
Helps build more genuine and meaningful relationships
People are more attracted to you…who doesn’t want to be more attractive ; )
You see new opportunities
Helps you age more gracefully
OK, now that you are aware that Positive Thinking is awesome let me tell you about the Downsides of Positive Thinking….and why my dad was trying to rip my head off when I told him to think positively.
Positive Thinking can create disappointment if the outcome is not what you expect it to be.
Positive Thinking can create unrealistic expectations and goals. Positive thinking alone is not always enough to reach your goals. Discipline, motivation, the ability to accept setbacks and realistic goals are important as well.
Positive Thinking makes you feel like a failure if you are not successful. How many times have I compared myself to my more successful friends believing I must be a failure. Unfortunately, positive thinking does not promise success.
Positive Thinking requires a lot of mental training on your part. You can’t just do it when it’s convenient. It has to be practiced every day like gratitude.
I’m all about “Positive Thinking”, “Positive Vibes”, and “Positive Attitude” but at the end of the day it cannot magically cure your depression or land you that dream job. You can use positive thinking to defeat self-doubt, to tackle complicated problems, to help you build meaningful relationships and to change your perspective.
“A positive attitude gives you power over your circumstances instead of your circumstances having power over you.” (Joyce Meyer)
